January and February Guidance Lessons

In January and February I visited classrooms to discuss Conflict Resolution. We focused on Habit 5: Seek First to Understand and then to be Understood and Habit 4: Think Win-Win to resolve conflicts when the arise.

2nd graders were my Leadership Spotlight this month. They heard the book "Enemy Pie" by Derek Munson via storylineonline.net and created a Venn Diagram comparing and contrasting the two main characters in the story. Students also identified the problems and solutions that were presented in the story. Students identified that using Habit 5 helps us to understand others before making judgments of them thus eliminating many problems and arguments.

Students in Kindergarten read the book "Don't Squeal Unless it's a Big Deal" by Jeanie Franz Ransom. Students learned that many problems that happen with their friends are "kid sized problems" that they can solve on their own rather than running to an adult for help. As a group we discussed many different scenarios and students decided whether the problem was an emergency that they needed to tell an adult right away, or if the problem was one they could solve on their own. We came up with many different ways to solve the problems ourselves rather than always tattling to an adult.

Students in 1st grade listened to "Howard B. Wigglebottom Learns to Listen" by Howard Binko. Students learned that they can use Habit 1: Be Proactive and being a good listener helps prevent many problems from happening. Students learned many ways to be a good listener and also identified many different ways to help solve problems when they occur rather than fighting or arguing.

3rd graders learned how to create "I-messages" to solve problems when they have them. Students worked in groups to create an "I-message" for many different scenarios that they may have. An example is: "I feel left out when you don't let me play. Please let me have a turn." Students then read the story "Trouble Talk" by Judy Ludwig and identified how an I-message could have helped the characters in the story solve the problems they were having rather than arguing and fighting.

Students in 4th grade learned about Habit 4: Think Win-Win. They identified the barriers to thinking win-win and how using this habit can help them work together better with others as well as be more productive. Students watched a video about a team of hikers who climbed Mt. Everest with a blind member. Students identified how Think Win-Win helped them to achieve this goal together rather than causing them to "fail" when they faced hardships on the journey. Students then applied the concept of Think Win-Win to scenarios that they may face at school or home as a 4th grader.

Students in 5th grade received a Lee's Summit Cares Bullying presentation from Kerri Gray as their lesson this month.

6th graders also learned about Habit 4: Think Win-Win and how this can be used in the face of conflict to help them solve the conflict by allowing everyone to have a bit of success rather than a "winner" and "loser." Students watched a video about the Lego Company and how they used Think Win-Win when they were faced with "hackers" who were getting into a new online system they had created. Students discussed how new and innovative ideas can come when one looks at conflict as a potential win-win rather than a win-lose. Students also applied the concepts of Think Win-Win to scenarios they may face at school or home as a 6th grader.

October and November Guidance Recap

In October I conducted Body Safety lessons in all grades. Students receive this lesson yearly!

In November students received lessons on Habit 1: Be Proactive.

Kindergarten students read the book What if Everybody Did That by Ellen Javernick. Students discussed the Circle of Control and how being proactive is focusing on ourselves and our actions, not the actions of others. We are only in charge of ourselves, not anyone else. Even if others are doing things that are not ok, we can be ok and control what we do. Kindergartners are my spotlight of the month and completed a "What if everybody________________." page that included proactive, positive actions!

First grade students read Lily's Purple Plastic Purse by Kevin Henkes and recognized how Lily was reactive when things didn't go her way rather than proactive. Students discussed ways to help themselves stop and think and make a proactive choice to something that causes them a difficult emotion rather than being reactive.

Second graders read Stand Tall Molly Lou Melon by Patty Lovell and discussed how Molly Lou Melon was proactive in how she responded to a bully who was making fun of her at her new school.

In Third grade students compared and contrasted being "reactive" (exploding when facing pressure or a difficult emotion, something that is hard for them, or a situation that they don't like) vs being a water bottle and being proactive (staying calm, choosing to respond in a clam manner and remaining in control). Together we created a circle of control and discussed how we are more influential when we focus on the things we can control (inside our circle of control) rather than the things we can't control (things outside our circle of control).



Fourth graders read The Juice Box Bully by Bob Sornson and Maria Dismondy. They identified proactive language throughout the book, especially in a promise that students in the book made regarding how they would respond to other's unkind behavior. I taught students a leadership skill "Stop and Think" to help them learn to be proactive when responding to a situation that causes them anger, frustration, or another difficult emotion. Students brainstormed ways to "stop and think" before responding to different situations, and worked in groups to apply this strategy to different scenarios I provided them. The also watched a short video about a gymnast who was born without legs. This gymnast was very proactive and never used the word "can't". The video is below:


For an example of a Stop and Think chart, please click here.

In Fifth Grade students were also taught the soda can vs water bottle visual and completed a self-evaluation to measure how reactive or proactive they currently are. They also completed a stop and think chart about a current situation that they face that causes them to be reactive and brainstormed ways to help them "stop and think" to help them become more proactive.

In Sixth Grade students were taught the soda can vs water bottle visual and discussed how they are able to choose how they respond to adversity and set backs in life. Being reactive to these set backs will hinder their ability to reach their goals. Instead, being proactive and choosing to overcome will go a long way toward them reaching their goals. Students watched an inspiring video about a para-Olympic record setting athlete who overcame great adversity and exhibited many proactive and leadership qualities. To see the video, please click here.

December lessons will focus on kindness to others even when they are different from us, as well as giving to others and being grateful for what we have.

Bullying Lessons Recap

I have completed Bullying lessons in all grades to date. I am thrilled that in many classes students identified that they believe we don't have much bullying at HPE! I challenged each class to use what they learned and remembered early this year to stop bullying when they see it and challenged them to not engage in bullying behavior themselves. This was my goal in doing bullying lessons in September--to stop bullying behavior from even happening this whole year.

Kindergartners read the book Hands are Not for Hitting by Martine Agassi. We used this book to introduce to bullying behavior and identify bullying. Students learned many ways to use their hands (helping, doing, drawing, building, communicating) to develop healthy relationships but not to use their hands to hit others.

First Graders read the book Bullies Never Win by Margery Cuyler. Students identified the negative feelings and emotions that bullying causes in others. Students identified ways to stop bullying if they see it. Students also discussed how to be a good friend rather than how to be a bully--focusing on using Habit 1: Be Proactive and being in charge of their actions and how they treat others, and Habit 5: Seek First to Understand and then to be Understood to identify with the feelings of others.

In Second grade students learned about how Seek First to Understand and then to be Understood helps develop empathy. Empathy is taking a walk in another person's shoes and seeking to understand how that person feels before making a choice of how to talk to or treat someone. If students develop empathy by using Habit 5 they will likely make the decision not to bully others as well as stand up to bullying when they see it happening to other people. Students read the book The Bully Blocker's Club by Teresa Bateman and identified Habit 5 and Habit 6, Synergize, in the book and discussed how these habits helped the characters stop bulling in their school.

In Fifth grade students viewed an interactive power point to review bullying and we discussed in detail cyber-bullying. Students discussed how Habit 5 can help students stop bullying when they see it. By Seeking First to Understand someone, we can think of how it would feel to be them or in their situation and that would drive how we decide to treat them or talk to them, and we can use this to stop and stand up to bullying. Students also watched the bullying video "Gum in My Hair."

In sixth grade, students participated in an activity called "What Are You Carrying Around?" One student volunteered to wear a backpack with bricks in it through the lesson. During the lesson the class viewed different pictures and discussed in small groups what they believed was happening in the picture, the different feelings the individuals in the picture had, etc. Then students were shown the complete picture and given the information regarding what was really happening. We used this as a way to discuss what empathy is: when you have the whole story of someone's life you can understand what they are going through and you might choose to treat them differently. At the end of the lesson I checked with the student volunteer who was holding the backpack through the lesson. As a class we brainstormed various things that 6th graders might "carry in their backpack" such as friendship problems, problems at home, homework, stress, anxiety, pressure to do well, pressure to be popular. We discussed how all of this stress (and literally the backpack with bricks) feels heavier and more burdensome overtime. Then I placed a brick labeled "bullying" in the backpack and we talked about how if we knew what others were carrying in their backpack we might choose not to add to their stress the weight that bullying carries.